I was watching Friends yesterday when I came upon this bit where Joey tells Rachel how hard it was for him to love her and not have her love him back. Ah! The Unrequited Love (with intentional capitals!). It makes me feel all squishy squashy inside.
This concept is a very, very popular idea with writers and authors. It is one that is sure to pull at the heart strings. It is tragic. It is painful. It is sentimental. It generates sympathy. It also generates selling stories!!!
I mean, who does not feel bad for Charlie Brown when he sees his 'little red-haired girl' ? Who does not feel bad for Joey when he hugs Rachel after cujo?? Look how great it sounds in stories!Look how much revenue it generates!!!
But seriously, isn't it very sad? As long as it's on screen, you can just go along with it and then forget it after the show. But when it hits you in real life? I know a few of my friends who've been thru' the same stuff. Their misery was very painful to behold. But you are helpless. How do you help someone with their unrequited love?
I first had a taste of this myself a couple of years back when my heartthrob on screen got married to his girlfriend!(How pathetic am I? to fall in love with a film star!).
Though I've always held the belief that the heart's just a pump and so it can't think, it was then that I realised that feelings can give you actual physical pain and this pain is kinda centered around the heart area. If it's your mind that's doing the thinking, why is the pump getting affected?
Though the concept maybe as old as time, the questions that it leaves are unanswerable.
Well, as one who has passed this unrequited love phase, I can safely say that it's great while it lasts. And it's not that hard to get over it once it's over. And when you look back, it sure makes some great memories!
Then again, maybe I was able to get over it pretty easily since all I had to love was a movie star, for pete's sake! It may be a lot harder for a real person, though I wouldn't know that. But I have a feeling that it'll be pretty hard but not impossible to get over with!
10 comments:
யாருக்காக....
இது யாருக்காக?
for all those who have been through this :-)
can't you identify with it?? ;-)
its tough
hahahaa.. Bala its tough, yes.. the thing is, one can very well unstan that this wine(love) is not good for health and for the practical living, but still he/she becomes an adict to it and continue with it... If he/she tries something to come out of it, they will get into that still deeper.. its a nonsense psychological problem...
Everything comes to an end.. For Devdas, its when he died, for Meera its when she was taken away by God(not death), for Autograph sendhil its till he met another girl... Everone has their own track...
But it is interesting!
(ipodhaiku indha mokka podhumnu nenaikren)
fortunately didn't experience this phase..but ya it's a difficult one to get over....It's even more difficult to console those who refuse to overlook it..!
Unrequited love is often the truest form of love, though one is likely to elevate the moments one has lived through, in retrospect. When you think of the days gone by, you feel your feelings for that person were more powerful, intense, truer and larger than life than what they actually were during that period. Although you can let go as time passes, you never stop from thinking “what if…” especially when you go through rough patches. As Oscar Wilde has said, “One's real life is often the life that one does not lead.”
@tamizh
hey.. wine is actually good for health :-) it sure is interesting!
@preethika
too often we find ourselves in the consoling end and that sure puts us in a tough posish!
@maddie
truest form of love? i think it is the kinda love that you may show on inanimate objects. you can be sure of going on loving them in the comfortable knowledge that there wont be any reciprocation; and in many cases the fear that they may reciprocate adversely!
hey what happened to your blogs? both of them have vanished??
yea I deleted them... was not updating them regularly..will start something new maybe..
neeyavadhu paravaille mathi....I m hopelessly in love with sonu nigam.....now talk about unrequited love to me ;-) :P :)
oh prits.. i can totally empathize with you!!
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